2/25/2009 12:34:00 PM

Fashion, Continued

Hosiery with holes.

Just..... no.

In other news, sometimes I wonder why I have everything together except for

ONE thing

and that ONE thing can turn me into an angry, vindictive mess.

PW is probably right, I will have to tackle it sooner or later. But right now I'm engaging in avoidance, which, ironically, is what I accuse the other party of doing.

Sometimes I wish I wasn't a psychologist; it is so much easier to live in complete ignorance.

Dying to the flesh is ridiculously painful, sometimes.

2/20/2009 12:05:00 AM

Things guys should never wear

1. Wife beaters alone = trashy look
2. V-cut fitted t-shirt, showing man cleavage
3. Briefs, too tight may lower your "fertility count"
4. Plain white dress shirt with blue lines for a wedding... Chinese boys do this. It bores girls.
5. Polo or any shirt with unbuttoned buttons without an undershirt.... no one wants to see chest hair peeking out
6. Popped collar, what is this, 1995
7. White suit, unless you're in a musical
8. Sweats unless you're working out... otherwise it's just frumpy, and you will only attract frumpy girls
9. White socks with black shoes, which is UTTER BLASPHEMY
10. Insert your own here

2/12/2009 11:48:00 PM


Awhile back I found this cool deal to buy $25 restaurant certs for $3 each. So being Chinese, I went all out and bought a lot of them without thinking about just when I might get to spend them. Now I am burdened with the heavy heavy calling to use all my gift certificates. So I had to wring Irene, Ruth & Elaine's arms to be my dates and to accompany me to Makeda's for Ethiopian food, which I've never tried.

It took some convincing, obviously. I am lucky I have such patient and generous friends. It is not easy to eat with me, since I tend to talk a lot. And people who talk a lot tend to have very stupid things come out of their mouths. The grace of God is truly manifest in my friends.

It's pretty easy to sum up Ethiopian food. At least for me -- it felt like I was eating Indian food. But with my hands and using sourdough crepe. Some of the meats were interesting. Most of them were really good, but two tasted like used coffee grinds. Weird, huh?

One thing I realize... Proverbs totally got it right. Good company makes food so much more enjoyable. Sucky company, on the other hand, totally gives you emotional (and sometimes physical) diarrhea. Ick.

1 certificate down... 4 more to go? 4 more dates with more girl friends. Too bad we don't have a witty equivalent to the male term "bromance." I would so be using it right now.

2/09/2009 03:21:00 PM

The world's an ugly, ugly place

For those who are not as 'culturally savvy' (or nosy in other terms), I've been following the story of Chris Brown and Rihanna since it unfolded last night around Grammys time. For those who you who don't know, these are both singers. Their relationship has been well documented by tabloid and other more 'reputable' media.

Apparently Chris Brown was arrested last night on charges of domestic violence toward an 'unnamed' female. So, although it may be obvious for some people to jump to conclusions, the name of the victim was never supposed to be released because the law protects the identity of domestic abuse victims. But surprise surprise, it didn't take long for tabloids to do some snooping around and identify the alleged victim as Rihanna.

Being a volunteer advocate on the SART (sexual assault response team) on campus, I have very heated thoughts about how there is apparently no respect for Rihanna's privacy, but as a Christian, I am even more deeply grieved at some of the comments people leave on sites that published the story. Here are some choice snippets:

'There is no way Chris Brown did any of this...if anything he was probably fighting her off. I have heard she super jealous and quite a drama queen...we'll see when the truth comes out!'
"He's a typical n_____."
"Um, bite marks....... sorry to say, but it sounds like Chris may have been defending himself. That is usually how someone is bitten. I think it is funny that we all assume that Chris is the offender here. Women go crazy and start fights ALL THE TIME! If she was trying to push at him and hit him and he was trying to defend himself, then she would be the one with all of the marks....not him."

Then there are the occasional crude umbrella jokes and some misogynistic remarks.

What is it about technology that allows people to be so mean to people they've never known? To make snap judgments? To feel that they have leeway (because of "anonymity") to write racist or sexist comments? I suppose the bigger question is, is there anything sacred anymore in this age where we are all technologically connected? Do we still respect a person's right to privacy or due process? I can either think of this as people just not being aware of how they act when they are not seen, or I can see this as an indicator of people's true nature. As much as I wish I could think it's just the former I keep assuming it's the latter.

What really saddened me the most is when issues of privacy come up then people engage in victim blaming. "Then she should have never pursued such a public career to begin with.' What? So Rihanna's choice of career path justifies others' insensitive, judgmental attitude on her current situation?

And by using Rihanna, don't think I'm making any statements about Chris Brown in any way. I feel for him too, and by how trapped and upset they must both be feeling.

Have you ever thought about how technology makes people lose their sense of propriety and decency?

2/02/2009 05:46:00 PM


This past Saturday, I participated in the Don't Walk By Campaign (http://www.dontwalkby.org/), an outreach event for the homeless in Manhattan.

I was not too happy the night before I hear that temperatures were going to be in the 20s and that we would be out walking, combing the streets of Harlem for homeless in the bitter cold.

(As an aside: Why hello again Riverside Drive, I thought I left you and your bone-biting winter chill years ago when I graduated from Barnard, but I guess not.)

Covered in layers of clothing, ski jacket, hat and gloves (I really wished I had a ski mask though, it got so cold talking felt like I was doing it with Novocaine), we ventured out for about 3 hours in search for people who needed a warm place to stay for the night.

We did not come across many people as it was so cold that many of them were hiding out at Penn Station and other subway stops (and there were other teams who were assigned subway stations), but on the whole I was very glad that I participated in this event. I think just by being part of it helped me to realize the need in the city and how easily it is to not even notice the homeless once you start ignoring them. And I feel by doing this campaign that it has made it more easily for me to start seeing these people as people in the future.

But being faced with such poverty really is a 'make or break' moment. Do I believe that despite the limited things I can do that God is good? Do I believe God is bigger than poverty? Do I believe that good is going to win in the end?

These questions were on my mind at the end of the night as I stood in the crowded church. All of a sudden, I noticed a volunteer put her arms gently around a tired, dirty, and unshaven old man as he eagerly sifted through the volunteer lanyards to keep a couple for himself. She smiled and patiently waited for him to pick two he liked, even though they were all the same. I kept watching and took in her clean white coat, her put-together appearance, her blonde hair, her height, her white skin, her all-togetherness, and I watched as she without reservation interacted with the dirty smelly old dark-skinned homeless man. I felt all at once proud, shy, ashamed of myself, inspired, tired, and happy at the same time.

And I decided the answer was "Yes."