Creative excuses I've heard during my teaching career

Here are all the popular excuses I've gotten so far from undergraduates, hoping that I will give them a grade they didn't work for, in order of WTF ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!:

1. Death of a loved one - "I thought it'd be ok for us to plagarize off of each other, since our relative/friend/significant other passed away, and we were so stressed out. We were sure you'd understand!"
2. I am in therapy - "I am hoping you may pass me with a temporary fail and grant me sufficient time to rectify my situation. Attached is an insanely general and vague email from some therapist with a Masters degree in EDUCATION saying that I have depression and anxiety issues, and therefore should be excused from missing all the labs this semester, not responding to your emails, ignoring my warning grade, and not bothering to come to you until there is one week left in the semester."
3. I am a senior - "I know I was a total slacker this semester, but oh I am a senior and oh this is the last class I need to graduate and oh if you can just give me at least a C or something even though I know I don't deserve it and oh if you can just do that I would be eternally grateful to you and will sing your praises to all humanity and name my firstborn after you oh I would so appreciate it."
4. It's Sakai's fault - "Professor Grace I swear I submitted all my assignments on time, I don't know why Sakai rejected all my assignments, I didn't know until I checked today that I got Fails in all my work (even though you told us to check routinely and come speak to you with any discrepancies), but yeah well here is what I have and I hope you'll just take all my work that's 10 weeks late and give me a good grade, kthxbye."

I'm sure as I teach I'll get increasingly creative ones. Looking forward to it!

serious, serious trouble

after discussion with some girlfriends, there are three things in life that serves as our achille's heel (heels?), kryptonite (kryponites?) and water (waters?)

1. God
2. food
3. boys who play the guitar and sing. well. brilliantly. melting-girls-to-puddles kind of awesome.

1 is ok to have to have as a weakness, 2 is mildly ok to have, and 3 is trouble. serious, serious trouble. that's why i should stop watching youtube.

:O

It is true that some preach Christ out of envy and rivalry, but others out of goodwill. The latter do so in love, knowing that I am put here for the defense of the gospel. The former preach Christ out of selfish ambition, not sincerely, supposing that they can stir up trouble for me while I am in chains. But what does it matter? The important thing is that in every way, whether from false motives or true, Christ is preached. And because of this I rejoice.

Whatever happens, conduct yourselves in a manner worthy of the gospel of Christ.

For with the judgment you pronounce you will be judged, and with the measure you use it will be measured to you.

Philippians 1 and Matthew 7, respectively.

Paul... you are one cool guy! "Because of this I rejoice." That's insane. And when Jesus gave that sermon, I always imagine him affectionately but firmly chastising his followers. I don't know why I think that. Maybe from watching some Jesus movie when I was a kid? Matthew 7 totally saved my butt today when I was working with one of my patients for the last time. She came in all pissed off about everyone... I started getting pissed off at her for being so judgmental... and then this verse came to me. And I began to see her as someone who was really "lost and harassed, like sheep without a shepherd." And although I did not lose the thought that I still think she is misled, I was able to have more compassion for her and responded to her differently. Despite my 'Christian' tendency to want to nail in her head the 'reality' or truth of the situation.

The way that God works sometimes does not fit into my nice-and-clean box I have defined for him.

And this is the verse that brings tears to my eyes, every time I read it and think about the state of the church and the hope Jesus had for us:
"Holy Father, keep them in your name, which you have given me, that they may be one, even as we are one." - John 17:11

windswept

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

On Sunday I won a game of horse. In skirts and heels!

I guess if I were playing against more competitive people that would have never happened, but since it was a very friendly game...

But it was funny how divine retribution plays out. Especially after SOMEONE said, "But I'm going to destroy you" after I suggested playing...

...And props to Allan, Kai, & Henry for fixing my bathtub faucet (I was really impressed and pleasantly surprised :P)... now I don't have to be driven insane by the constant dripping sound. Guys who are good around the house are really cool. Curiously guys who tend to be good around the house don't live with their parents. An observation of a correlation.

I'm just sayin'.

one of my pet peeves is...

...bad grammar.






No, fate will not have 'it's' way with me, until he takes some lessons in basic English and learn the difference between possessive 'its' and the shortened form of 'it is.'

By the way, the "oh SNAP!" picture of the day:

i'm no better, but infinitely better

Items in my life that gives most "bang for its buck"

1. Riding boots that I've had since sophomore year in college
2. Mini George Foreman Grill
3. White Forever 21 scarf
4. MacBook
5. Carmen
6. Lint rollers
7. Bootleg China suitcase I've used for everything, from travel to laundry to transporting tests as a TA
8. Rice
9. Faculty/Staff parking pass for Rutgers
10. Jesus... or eternal salvation... best deal ever

Things that I find give the least 'bang of its buck' when guys who are usually passive get their boxers all tangled up in a knot defending
1. iPhone
2. iPhone
3. iPhone

I don't mind if you like your iPhone, but if I don't see that same type of zealous energy you display when I say the iPhone is lame applied to doing God's work or serving in ministry, then your argument is moot for me.

As Lent comes to an end and materialism rears its ugly head again, I'm reminded that I already have the newest, best, and most 'revolutionary' gift of all, the love of Christ.

And that is one gift that is fully deserving of my praise, energy and attention.