The dust has settled

Now that I know where I am going in August for pre-doc internship (VA hospital [whoo-hoo!] in West Haven [blegh]), I'm trying to cram all my traveling & seeing family in before I depart Dirtee Jerzee for at least a year (or two).

Spring break: Fort Lauderdale
Spring break 2: Hong Kong
Sometime between spring break 2 and summer break: Dissertation
Summer: Originally Malawi, but on second thought, not such a good idea since I'll have to focus on moving. Maybe someplace in Europe for two weeks. Germany? Italy? Or maybe a cruise to the Caribbeans? If I have time & money then.

I can't believe I'm leaving Jersey. Mixed feelings.

Internship

1 in 5 applicants do not match.

A total of 45% of all applicants who obtained a position matched to their first choice internship program, approximately two-thirds (66%) received one of their top two choices, and nearly four-in-five (78%) received one of their top three choices.

What this means for me: Do not end up the "1 in 5", then roll the dice and become part of that 45% who get their first choice.

If I don't get my first choice, but match, most likely that will mean I will either have to move back to Bergen County or Connecticut, and I don't really want to do either. My first choice is my first choice by a lot.

2.5 weeks of waiting... we'll see what happens.

becoming a hermit

And the finalists are...
CT VA (West Haven)
NJ VA (Newark & Lyons)
MD VA (Baltimore)
UMDNJ (Newark)
Montefiore (NYC)
Trinitas (NJ)
UMDNJ (Piscataway)
American Lake VA (Tacoma, WA)

8 is not bad. I was not aware of this until recently, but supposedly I applied to some of the really competitive VAs (West Haven & Baltimore) where if I get matched there, I will totally kick butt as a psychologist specializing in SMI. My professional self would love to go there, but my personal self prefers to stay in NJ/NY. We'll see.

With all the internship/dissertation stuff and my mind focused on the future, I've been feeling pretty tired. I used to love hanging out with people, but for the past month or so I noticed myself becoming more reclusive. I look forward to staying in on the weeknights and meeting with only 1-2 people tops on the weekends. Big groups tire me. It may also have to do with the Driscoll sermon I listened to on Christian friendship that made me realize I really don't have as many genuine friendships as I thought I did (and this was only affirmed when PW started his series on genuine fellowship that same week). What bothers me the most is that all this doesn't bother me much (makes sense?). I'm pretty much ok with seeing less people for now. Maybe it is partly because my life is in flux, and I'm holding my breath to see where I will be. Once I find out in February, then I will have to start making some big decisions.

For now I'm focused on developing the genuine friendships I have - the ones that are God-centered, not activity-centered - and waiting to see what unfolds for the next two years of my life. I wish I could sound more excited, but that's how tired I am. :P

Status so far

Internship interviews. I am in a state of 'controlled panic,' but still mostly at peace. I love God, and he is good.

Interviews completed:
CT VA (West Haven)
NJ VA (Newark & Lyons)

Interviews upcoming:
MD VA (Baltimore)
UMDNJ (Newark)
Montefiore (NYC)

Rejections:
Portland VA
Seattle VA
Boston Consortium
Bellevue (NYC)
St. Luke's (NYC)
Maimonides (NYC)
Coler-Goldwater (NYC)

Waiting to hear:
Trinitas (NJ)
UMDNJ (Piscataway)
Edith Nourse VA (Boston)
American Lake VA (Tacoma)

So I guess people are right when they say NYC is still psychodynamically oriented. Very much so. And except for Tacoma (and I'm totally expecting rejection from them), all the West Coast sites have turned me down. So God has definitely answered my prayers that he would close doors to places I 'should not' be for the next two years. It looks like I'll be sticking around the East Coast. Not sure how I feel about that yet.